The Day I Should Have Stayed In Bed
I’m pretty sure that everybody has one. For me, it’s a sign that the "March of the Cramps" is coming. The one day a month that you feel like you’ve got 10 thumbs. When handling power tools is a BIG no-no.
Sometimes it’s not so bad. A papercut and a dropped fork.
Slammed the tip of my left pinky in a cabinet door. Hurt like hell but I later found out that it’s the EXACT spot that I hold a needle and I kind of have a gash there, now.
Broke a glass while trying to clean out a squirt spout.
Splashed chocolate syrup all over the counters, me and the floor. Freaked me out because I didn’t want Wes to try to lick it. Chocolate + cats = poison.
All kind of little. Then the big stuff happened.
A few weeks back, we bought some storage units for our garage. All need to be built. All are in boxes in the garage.
Yesterday Tom got a shipment of a desk and hutch, from Staples. Still in boxes, needing to be built. And a safe. I had the delivery guy leave them outside the garage so Tom could make room and bring them in.
He needed my help.
"Stand there", he said, "while I move these over. Don’t lean them against you, just make sure they stay upright."
I’m thinking, "This stuff weighs about 300 lbs. How the heck….?" But I keep my mouth shut.
OK. I’m leaning against them. Keeping them upright.
Me: "Tom. They’re falling!"
Him: "Push against them!" (uh-huh. 300 vs 130. There’s a chance that will work.)
The fell into me. I fell backwards into a band saw. I hoped it would hold the weight but it didn’t. It tipped forward and, in the process, the metal leg ripped thru my jeans (my beloved Lee Riveted) and into the back of my thigh.
Yes. It’s true. Tom broke me.
I don’t know if I’m more upset about the leg, or the jeans. I mean, the leg will heal.
Now I’ve got a 7" "rip" in my leg. Not a bad gash, more of a bad scrape. Minimal blood loss. But HOLY MOLEY the bruising that was already there, this morning! About a 3" wide path on either side of that scrape. Pretty purples and blues.
The funniest thing is that I couldn’t stop laughing. I mean, picture it. Go ahead, I’ll wait………
I can hardly walk. Sitting is kinda difficult. And I get to use the excuse "You know, Tom, I WOULD make dinner…but THE LEG." With a sweeping motion of my hand.
You’ve gotta pay to play but it works for everything from "Feed the cat" to "Close the blinds".
Daddy broke the Momma. Send yarn…and chocolate.